In case you hadn't noticed, the worst and most persistent global recession since the 1930s has radically altered the way we are allowed to discuss our jobs, IF we are still fortunate enough to have them. If you have been unlucky enough to have missed this radical shift in sentiment, chances are good that you have suffered some bruising verbal retorts, or soon will until you figure it all out.
These changes have been written in stone since mid-2008, when the global economies went from floundering to free fall. Save yourself some grief, and read on.
Example one. You announce to your friends that you have worked 14 days straight without a rest, and still have at least another week to go before you get some time off from work.
The Old Way that friends viewed that kind of statement: commiseration, shock, anger, exhortations to have your boss sued or offers of help in finding you a new job, or both.
The New Way: Your friends consider you extremely fortunate. Not only do you have a job, you're apparently so valuable that your bosses or clients constantly need you.
Example two. You see someone working at a job that looks grimy, tedious, difficult, smelly and low paying. Perhaps a job like underground sewer line inspector.
Old Way of viewing it: You would rather be homeless than accept a job like that.
New Way: You are worried about becoming homeless, and you ask Mr. Grimy Sewer Guy if he knows of any job openings.
Example three: health benefits.
Old Way: If it wasn't perfect. If it wasn't free. If it didn't cover everything including non essential care, if every doctor in America didn't accept it, you were free to complain about it, a lot.
New Way: It costs way too damned much. You have to fight to get covered for essential things, like breast cancer screenings, and it takes you weeks to find some unimpressive physician who will take your insurance. And you are thrilled, because half of your friends have no health coverage at all.
Example Four: The old way of viewing "So, how's work?" as a conversation starter. Perfectly reasonable. The new way--a really bad idea, since so many people seem to say now that they have lost their jobs.
Other new rules: Never complain about having too little vacation time. A lot of people are on extended, and unwanted 'vacations' from work. Never complain about having to take a 'Staycation,' staying at home on your time off. Again, if you have any type of paid time off, it means you still have a job.
Your response when you are asked any of these kinds of questions about how your job is going? 'No complaints' is a good standard answer. I have one old friend who works at an office that has been decimated by cutbacks and layoffs. He puts this big silly grin on his face when he is asked and says, in this ridiculously cheery and sarcasic voice: NEVER BETTER!
So, tonight, I've got it all down. Spotted a couple of my unemployed friends at the coffee shop. They asked me how the new business was going. I was circumspect and quickly changed the subject. Relatives called who had been looking for work for months, asking me how I was doing. I talked about anything that did not involve money--either having it or spending it.
I have been wondering when I would know when this recession is over, that the recovery is fully underway, that we were on our collective way back from this awful brink. I think I know now. It'll be when I start to hear people complain about their jobs again.
I can't wait.
